Really great conversation between two incredible women!
In my most humble opinion, I believe that when mothers first find out that they are mothers, when it's a "surprise," there's a certain level of grief that happens. That part when you're not thrilled, that to me speaks of grief and that's not talked about a lot in our society. I believe that's normal because you're grieving your old life, you're grieving that maiden phase of womanhood because you've now reached the mother phase. Of course it's different for everyone, everyone has such unique journeys. We just don't talk about every journey, so thank you for sharing yours with us Jeannie. It is humbling.
Composting your writing, keep turning to reveal the deeper truth- what a quote and process!
WOW, Sam, your wisdom shared here really humbled me. I have never heard of this as a transition from maiden phase to mother phase. That is powerful language. And you are absolutely correct: there is a level of grief here, a hidden and perhaps taboo type of grief, because many women are taught (I am speaking for myself) that motherhood is the highest calling for a woman. So if we feel differently, especially conflicted or even suffocated by motherhood, there is a certain level of shame that accompanies that.
Totally agree with you on this Jeannie. Maiden, Mother, Crone is representative of the three phases of life that women go through. It's something that is thought of as "witchy." So not many women know about it, unfortunately.
Jeannie! I have sitting in notes app A half written essay entitled The Maiden, Mother, and Crone. Just sitting there gathering dust. Maybe a collab of the phases with @Sam Messersmith as the three of us represent those three phases of a womans life from youth, Maiden (Sam) fertility and nurturing (you) Mother and (me) Crone, wisdom as I am at the end of a cycle. I think it would be a great exploration on where we are all at. Love this topic!
You give me life Jeannie Ewing! 🙌🏾😅 I just love your enthusiasm! Lets do this! I’m excited! I love serendipity amongst friends! Now @Sam Messersmith what say you?😉
Sherry just wrote that she’s working on an essay with this exact theme: maiden, mother, and crone! She said maybe the three of us could do a LIVE and talk about these different stages of womanhood, Sam. What do you think?
Sam yiu continue to amaze me with your wisdom drops. We actually discussed having a second interview or live on so much more of what was discussed today. Thank you for your thoughtful insight.
I absolutely loved this conversation. The two of you sounded like old friends sitting together at the kitchen table over a cup of tea. The intimacy was real and raw.
Sherry, you are a master at interviewing. the questions you ask are so much more deep and intimate than what I've experienced on dozens of other podcasts...both as a listener and a guest.
Jeannie, I've said this many times, you are a really really good speaker. The authenticity you bring, the raw realness of being a mother is so alive.
I especially loved the conversation the two of you had about being mothers to children with complex medical diagnoses.
Thank you, friend. Teri Leigh, you are such an encourager. It means a lot to hear what it was like for you listening in. I totally agree—Sherry has a gift with her podcast. I have been interviewed dozens of times by all types of radio and podcast hosts, and Sherry has a gift. I’ve never before felt that level of intimacy while being interviewed. It felt less like an interview, anyway, and more like what you described here—a conversation between friends. I think that’s the power of these types of connections, and Sherry brings something real, fresh, and needed to the spoken word.
Ok…you two have me gushing over here! 🥹🥹 I know you both don’t mince words and only speak what’s true from your hearts so this is a generous compliment and I receive it with humility and gratitude. 🙏🏾 Thank you both so much.🙏🏾
Teri, thank you so much for always being such a voice of support. I’ve been feeling a bit off kilter in the creative department these days so reading your comment helped smooth the edges of my emotions a bit which is always a welcomed balm.
It has been a joy for me getting to interview people so far that I admire and respect, like @Jeannie Ewing and @Sam Messersmith so it just makes it easier for me as the interviewer. Thank you and Neil for being my first amazing fun and generous guests! You two were the perfect first guests.🥰
This was a wonderful discussion, thank you both! Jeannie, I have always admired your honesty here on Substack. You give us permission to accept our feelings regardless of how others or even we ourselves may feel about them. And I also loved the conversation about composting our emotions and our past feelings. There's often so many layers that need to find their way to the light of day!
I thoroughly enjoyed this conversation Sherry and Jeannie.
Jeannie, what an awesome discussion! And you're right: our culture doesn't necessarily allow mothers to have darker thoughts. And I love when you say you write in such a way that "fear and hope hold hands."
Oh, and speaking about fear of motherhood (when you discuss how you felt when you were pregnant with Auggie), I felt intense fear and negative thoughts before I adopted my daughter from China. I waited four years desperately wanting her, but when the time to go to China drew near, I wanted to change my mind. It was a tough transition to motherhood. Now, looking back, my decision to seek out adoption was the right one.
Beth, I'm so glad to hear our conversation resonated with you. Its so good to know that when we share our stories, someone out there connects with it and doesn't feel so alone in what they may have gone through or going through. What a beautiful show of love choosing to adopt your daughter. I learned from you that even when a child doesn't come from your own body that their can be those huge shifts in emotions questioning or doubting if this is what we want. That was an aha moment for me as you shared that. Thanks for listening and sharing.
Sherry, I am so glad Beth has been introduced to you and your creative work. She does some incredible art and has a powerful story that I shared as my very first guest post in January! Here it is if you want to read it: https://jeannieewing.substack.com/p/your-dream-may-look-different-than
Hi Sherry. Thank you. Yes, I had those huge shifts in my emotional being over adoption. And, get this, I went through tons of courses about adoption beforehand, and experts and books prepared me for the adoption process, problems the child might have, etc. I was a good student and got through every bit of material, even learning some Mandarin to talk with my baby in her familiar sounds. And guess what? I was so unprepared. I had no idea what motherhood had in store for me.
Hi Beth! None of us are prepared for motherhood. No matter all the books we read to the path we choose. What to expect when you're expecting was the go to and once you have that child living and breathing in your home its another game all together. The emotional impact on you is profound. All that said, I have a feeling your an amazing mom!
Wow, that’s so powerful to hear about your experience, Beth, right before adopting your daughter—that you went through that transitional feeling of sitting on the edge between your own hope and fear. It really is like that as a mom, isn’t it? There’s no turning back once you say “yes.” You have to be all in. Thank you for all that you shared here and continue to open up about!
Yes, there's no turning back, for sure. I remember being on the plane to China, thinking "I don't want to do this." I was so scared of motherhood. Thank you, as always, for being honest with your readers/listeners. I appreciate you!
Really great conversation between two incredible women!
In my most humble opinion, I believe that when mothers first find out that they are mothers, when it's a "surprise," there's a certain level of grief that happens. That part when you're not thrilled, that to me speaks of grief and that's not talked about a lot in our society. I believe that's normal because you're grieving your old life, you're grieving that maiden phase of womanhood because you've now reached the mother phase. Of course it's different for everyone, everyone has such unique journeys. We just don't talk about every journey, so thank you for sharing yours with us Jeannie. It is humbling.
Composting your writing, keep turning to reveal the deeper truth- what a quote and process!
WOW, Sam, your wisdom shared here really humbled me. I have never heard of this as a transition from maiden phase to mother phase. That is powerful language. And you are absolutely correct: there is a level of grief here, a hidden and perhaps taboo type of grief, because many women are taught (I am speaking for myself) that motherhood is the highest calling for a woman. So if we feel differently, especially conflicted or even suffocated by motherhood, there is a certain level of shame that accompanies that.
Such good stuff here, Sam. Thank you!
Totally agree with you on this Jeannie. Maiden, Mother, Crone is representative of the three phases of life that women go through. It's something that is thought of as "witchy." So not many women know about it, unfortunately.
Wow, Sam, now you have inspired me to think about this and possibly write about it more. Thank you!
Jeannie! I have sitting in notes app A half written essay entitled The Maiden, Mother, and Crone. Just sitting there gathering dust. Maybe a collab of the phases with @Sam Messersmith as the three of us represent those three phases of a womans life from youth, Maiden (Sam) fertility and nurturing (you) Mother and (me) Crone, wisdom as I am at the end of a cycle. I think it would be a great exploration on where we are all at. Love this topic!
Whaaaaat?! Yes, I find this to be serendipitous, Sherry. Totally open to a collaborative conversation!
You give me life Jeannie Ewing! 🙌🏾😅 I just love your enthusiasm! Lets do this! I’m excited! I love serendipity amongst friends! Now @Sam Messersmith what say you?😉
That is awesome Jeannie! That makes me so dang happy to see you excited. I can't wait to see what you have to say about that one.
Sherry just wrote that she’s working on an essay with this exact theme: maiden, mother, and crone! She said maybe the three of us could do a LIVE and talk about these different stages of womanhood, Sam. What do you think?
I just saw that, I'm down!
Sam yiu continue to amaze me with your wisdom drops. We actually discussed having a second interview or live on so much more of what was discussed today. Thank you for your thoughtful insight.
I absolutely loved this conversation. The two of you sounded like old friends sitting together at the kitchen table over a cup of tea. The intimacy was real and raw.
Sherry, you are a master at interviewing. the questions you ask are so much more deep and intimate than what I've experienced on dozens of other podcasts...both as a listener and a guest.
Jeannie, I've said this many times, you are a really really good speaker. The authenticity you bring, the raw realness of being a mother is so alive.
I especially loved the conversation the two of you had about being mothers to children with complex medical diagnoses.
Thank you, friend. Teri Leigh, you are such an encourager. It means a lot to hear what it was like for you listening in. I totally agree—Sherry has a gift with her podcast. I have been interviewed dozens of times by all types of radio and podcast hosts, and Sherry has a gift. I’ve never before felt that level of intimacy while being interviewed. It felt less like an interview, anyway, and more like what you described here—a conversation between friends. I think that’s the power of these types of connections, and Sherry brings something real, fresh, and needed to the spoken word.
Ok…you two have me gushing over here! 🥹🥹 I know you both don’t mince words and only speak what’s true from your hearts so this is a generous compliment and I receive it with humility and gratitude. 🙏🏾 Thank you both so much.🙏🏾
Love you, Sherry!
Teri, thank you so much for always being such a voice of support. I’ve been feeling a bit off kilter in the creative department these days so reading your comment helped smooth the edges of my emotions a bit which is always a welcomed balm.
It has been a joy for me getting to interview people so far that I admire and respect, like @Jeannie Ewing and @Sam Messersmith so it just makes it easier for me as the interviewer. Thank you and Neil for being my first amazing fun and generous guests! You two were the perfect first guests.🥰
Love you, Sherry! XO
This was a wonderful discussion, thank you both! Jeannie, I have always admired your honesty here on Substack. You give us permission to accept our feelings regardless of how others or even we ourselves may feel about them. And I also loved the conversation about composting our emotions and our past feelings. There's often so many layers that need to find their way to the light of day!
Thank you Nancy for listening.
I’m so glad my conversation with Sherry touched your heart, Nancy. It means a lot that you took the time to listen and respond so thoughtfully!
I thoroughly enjoyed this conversation Sherry and Jeannie.
Jeannie, what an awesome discussion! And you're right: our culture doesn't necessarily allow mothers to have darker thoughts. And I love when you say you write in such a way that "fear and hope hold hands."
Oh, and speaking about fear of motherhood (when you discuss how you felt when you were pregnant with Auggie), I felt intense fear and negative thoughts before I adopted my daughter from China. I waited four years desperately wanting her, but when the time to go to China drew near, I wanted to change my mind. It was a tough transition to motherhood. Now, looking back, my decision to seek out adoption was the right one.
Beth, I'm so glad to hear our conversation resonated with you. Its so good to know that when we share our stories, someone out there connects with it and doesn't feel so alone in what they may have gone through or going through. What a beautiful show of love choosing to adopt your daughter. I learned from you that even when a child doesn't come from your own body that their can be those huge shifts in emotions questioning or doubting if this is what we want. That was an aha moment for me as you shared that. Thanks for listening and sharing.
Sherry, I am so glad Beth has been introduced to you and your creative work. She does some incredible art and has a powerful story that I shared as my very first guest post in January! Here it is if you want to read it: https://jeannieewing.substack.com/p/your-dream-may-look-different-than
Awww, thank you so much for your support, Jeannie. I appreciate you!
Same, Beth. :)
Hi Sherry. Thank you. Yes, I had those huge shifts in my emotional being over adoption. And, get this, I went through tons of courses about adoption beforehand, and experts and books prepared me for the adoption process, problems the child might have, etc. I was a good student and got through every bit of material, even learning some Mandarin to talk with my baby in her familiar sounds. And guess what? I was so unprepared. I had no idea what motherhood had in store for me.
Hi Beth! None of us are prepared for motherhood. No matter all the books we read to the path we choose. What to expect when you're expecting was the go to and once you have that child living and breathing in your home its another game all together. The emotional impact on you is profound. All that said, I have a feeling your an amazing mom!
You’re such an encourager, Sherry. :)
As are you my friend.❤️
Wow, that’s so powerful to hear about your experience, Beth, right before adopting your daughter—that you went through that transitional feeling of sitting on the edge between your own hope and fear. It really is like that as a mom, isn’t it? There’s no turning back once you say “yes.” You have to be all in. Thank you for all that you shared here and continue to open up about!
Yes, there's no turning back, for sure. I remember being on the plane to China, thinking "I don't want to do this." I was so scared of motherhood. Thank you, as always, for being honest with your readers/listeners. I appreciate you!
I feel the same about you, Beth!